Today I found out there was an office pool going on. People were betting on how long my marriage would last. It started years ago, and no one ever told me about it until now. I guess now it doesn’t matter any more.
The longest anyone thought was two years. I outlasted all of their bets by two and a half years.
I don’t know the details of it, didn’t really want to know. In fact I was a bit angry about it. Seriously?
All I know is that the shortest anyone betted was three months, and the longest was two years. Who betted what? I don’t want to know.
At first I thought they were joking. When I realize they weren’t I got mad. Most of these people were at my wedding, wishing me well. And then gambling against me behind my back.
I used to get upset at the people who blatantly spoke against everything from the beginning. I got upset with Tanya when I emailed her hours after I took the pregnancy test and told her what I had decided. She emailed back within minutes, harshly admonishing me for my hasty decision. She told me she understands how badly I want to have children, but marriage wasn’t the only solution. Numerous other people responded the same way, and I was mad at all of them because I thought they didn’t want me to be happy.
But today, finding out about the office pool, which was better? Those who did not hesitate to try to help me, or those who congratulated me openly while plotting my failure?
Yes, everyone saw the same thing, but the difference is in how they handled it. I have to admit that from some I would expect no less. But there were those who I thought better of.
Like I have always said, I am the most optimistic pessimist. Constantly expecting the worst, but still hoping for the best.