Category Archives: newborn

Am I Neglecting My Daughter?

It has been four days since I gave birth to my son. As I am sitting up at three in the morning feeding him, I realize I am missing my daughter. Granted it has been less than a week, I feel as if I have abandoned her. At first I thought it was just me being hormonal, but then hearing my husband echo my sentiments in that he feels he is abandoning his newborn son, I felt a little more justified.
My husband has always been my daughter’s favorite parent. She is a complete daddy’s little girl. But I still had special routines with her that provided us with quality mommy daughter time. We took our walks in the mornings, we ate our snacks together, we had bath time, and bed time. Since my little Ducky was born I have only spent a handful of minutes with my daughter. Is this how it is going to be from now on? She gets me second tier only if her younger brother doesn’t immediately need me? I should hope not.
Is my husband never going to have more than a few minutes with his son? I am sure several years from now this will in fact change, and both kids will have both parents all the time. But for now, I feel as though my daughter is getting replaced (which I hope is not how she is feeling). I am optimistic that all the extra attention my husband has been giving her makes up for any lost time with mommy.
Did you feel this way when having a second child?

P.S. That is an actual photo of my son.

When Is It Okay To Induce Labor?

In a couple of days I will be giving birth. Supposedly I am due July 28th. Last time my daughter arrived eight days early, so as far as I am concerned, I can go into labor any moment now. Frankly, I hope today is the day. I cannot wait to meet my son; the anticipation is almost too much to handle.

A friend of mine suggested I induce since she does it every time and it works for her. I cannot bring myself to do it. I am not suggesting inducing is a bad thing. To each their own. I am even okay with the women who schedule c-sections for no reason other than not wanting to deal with labor, or wanting their babies born on a specific date.

Just as I dislike how others judge me for using epidurals and pain meds, I am sure these women are tired of hearing comments from the peanut gallery about their particular choices. I do not want to discuss their choices, or pass judgment. I simply came to a personal conclusion; I cannot induce unless there is a medical reason for it. I think of pitocin (the drug used to induce) as a resource available if natural labor is not working, or if I happen well past my due date and there is some risk for the baby. I used pitocin when delivering my daughter because for whatever reason my body no longer wanted to cooperate, and I stopped dilating after seven centimeters. So close, yet so far.

I did not go to the hospital with the idea I would induce, or have to mess around with the natural progression of labor. I simply went into labor, and then labor came to a halt mid stream. Yet I was okay with it at that point. I accept intervention when things go awry. But as for actually being the catalyst, as much as I wish I was in the delivery room right now (and trust me, the urge is almost as bad as my craving for chocolate cake), I cannot bring myself to eliminate the element of surprise and excitement that comes during that moment when you realize it is finally happening. My baby and I are ready, and it is show time!

How do you feel about inducing?


How To Pack For Delivery Day

There are a lot of articles out there dedicated to lists of things to bring to the hospital with you when you go into labor. When I gave birth to my daughter I consulted numerous such lists, and inevitably ended up packing for an extended Caribbean cruise as opposed to a 48 hour hospital stay. As my son’s due date approaches I have comprised a list of things I actually needed and used the first time around. Some of the items on this list seem obvious, which causes them to be often overlooked.Also, packing in advance and putting the suitcase in the closet for future use prevents a lot of last minute panicking. However, some of the items on this list will not be packable until you are ready to leave for the hospital, so having a list out for a last minute check can be helpful. I remember having mine taped to my front door, reminding me of any minute items that needed to be grabbed as we rush out the door.

Robe – your doctor will most likely tell you to take a stroll down the hall a few times a day. Most hospitals run cold, and you also may not be dressed appropriately to step out in public (not that you would want to be).

Pajamas or night gown – I preferred a night gown. Made everything much easier.


Slippers – something easy to slip on and off without too much struggling.

Underwear – you can never over pack on these. You will go through several pairs per day, so take along as many as you like. No thongs or itsy bitsy ones. If there was ever a time for the granny panty, this is it.

Bra – regular bra and/or nursing bras will be helpful.

Nursing pads – whether you plan on nursing or not, these will come in handy in the first few days to protect against any unwanted leakage (as if leakage was ever wanted).

Sanitary napkins – the high absorbency kind are best at this stage. Panty liners come later.

Chap stick

Tooth brush/tooth paste

Soap – the stuff they provide at the hospital is not usually that good and it does not smell very nice either.

Body lotion


Shampoo/Conditioner – nothing will feel as good as your first shower after giving birth. Cleanliness takes on a whole new meaning.

Nipple cream – in case your little one is more aggressive than you anticipated.

Hair brush

Make up – you will have hoards of people coming to visit you, so if you are anything like me, you want to look presentable when they pop in to see how you are doing.

Glasses/saline solution – they say you should not wear contacts when giving birth. Well, taking them out was not on my priority list as I was in labor, and the thought completely escaped me until the next day. So, bring some eye drops, saline solution, and/or glasses with you.

Ipod/electronic device – there will be many hours of nothingness where you will want to keep yourself entertained to some degree. Bring music, a Kindle, Nintendo DS, or whatever will sooth you.

Book/magazines – See above.

Cash – hospitals are not best known for their culinary skills. I was not terribly disappointed by the food provided, but it was nice to have a little extra cash to get some vending machine goodies in between meals.

Camera/battery/charger – you will want to take lots of pictures of your bundle of joy. Some of you may want to videotape as well. Make sure your battery is fully charged beforehand and bring your charger with you for any additional power you may need.

Cell phone/charger – even though your phone may be surgically attached to your palm, your charger may not be as accessible. You don’t want to be left with no battery life while you are trying to inform the world about the birth of your beautiful baby. Also, if you have phone numbers stored elsewhere outside your phone, bring those along as well.

Going home clothes for you – after you give birth you will still look about five to six months pregnant, so bring along a comfortable, loose fitting outfit to wear home. Skip the jeans, you won’t be ready for those quite yet, nor will they feel very comfortable at this time (even if they are maternity jeans).

Going home clothes for baby – depending on what season you are giving birth, pack an outfit for baby, and don’t forget the booties and beanie since itsy bitsy babies get cold faster.

Insurance information/hospital preregistration – whether or not you are preregistered with the hospital, you will need your insurance information. I keep mine in my wallet at all times, but for those of you who don’t, pack it safely in your bag in an easily accessible place (burying it at the bottom of all of your other necessities might seem safe, but you will regret it when you are digging through your suitcase while having constant contractions and wanting nothing more than to lay down).

Birthing plan – if you have one, make sure you bring it to the hospital with you.

Infant car seat – you will not be allowed to leave the hospital without one.

What are some of your big day essentials?